I Resolve

It’s that time of year again, when everyone is making resolutions. Most of them involve losing weight or getting in shape and, while I have some of those myself, I don’t want that to be all I work towards this year.

So here’s my 2013 list of resolutions:

  1. I resolve to make positive changes in my life, especially in the way I treat my body, myself. I’m hard on myself. I’m my own worst critic. Most people are. The difference with me is that I know I have autoimmune issues, I know I have a family history, I know I have a troubled teenage-hood that all shaped me to be who I am and to think what I do about myself but I still constantly talk down to myself. With that in mind, this resolution is about learning to accept not only my positive aspects, but also the negative ones. It’s about listening to the signals my body is sending me and to make the changes I need to in order to be happier and healthier.
  2. I resolve (to try) to learn to be happy in my own skin. I know I have changes I need to make. I lost a lot of weight over the last 2 years, and I gained some back. While I want to continue to lose weight and get healthier (Hello, resolution #3.), I really want to learn to accept and love myself just the way I am – fat and all.
  3. I resolve to continue my journey to a healthier me. Yep, this is the “lose weight and get in shape” resolution. Can’t have a year without it. =P
  4. I resolve to not let wedding planning turn me in to a total crazy person. I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder and I’ve been told I have many obsessive-compulsive personality traits (though not full-blown OCD, thank goodness), this means that when I’m planning something, especially something big, I can get a bit worked up. This resolution is my way of saying that I don’t want to let myself get so worked up I lose sight of the fun, the happiness, the joy that is life and planning for the future.
  5. I resolve to figure “it” out. Finally, I resolve to (once I have health insurance again, of course) figure out exactly what “it” is that is causing this body drama. I know I have Sjogren’s now, and that’s a major step in the right direction, but that doesn’t account for everything going on inside of me. With my troublesome intrahepatic gallbladder removed, my meds stabilized, and Sjogren’s discovered, I shouldn’t still be having so many issues, but I am. I resolve to research and study and find a doctor who is willing to help me get to the bottom of this mess. If it turns out I have mild Celiac’s (it’s an idea that has been tossed around), then I resolve to go 100% gluten-free for good. If I can make changes to better my health and wellness, you bet your sweet patooty I’m going to.

What are your resolutions?

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